My publication history is long & extremely complex. The first book I ever wrote is still in my back pocket (hence the embarrassing nether bulge - it's over 800 pp). During the War of 1812, my third volume of poesie appeared under the auspices of the Publication Office of the Canadian Mounties. No, I was not a Tory : it's a long story : the manuscript was avoirdupoiserated (echt "ripped off") by a British spy named Hooliferous Gendarme, and published in the punklands of the north, without my knowledge or consent, as an aide-memoire or strategic map for the benefit of British troops! Not many months later (coincidence, huh???) the enemy invaded Washington and the White House was burned. All because of some silly poems pointing out the major throughways into the DC area at the time!

After my inauguration as President of the United Assembly of Poetry Weirdos of America (UAPWA), I began my gradual descent into the innards of literature, where I was welcomed with open intestines. Soon the calls for more books were coming at me like grapeshot, and I responded with my famous Ptui! Poetry Pamphlet Series, a noble sequence of Henry Gould Verse graciously emitted by Knopf (I mean Pnopf) (which, as most people know, won the Obulous Prize in 1999 (Denver, CO)).

My next book is due to appear in 1947. It will include a portion of my unwritten poetry, as well as a round-up of posthumous and impostorhumous work by the same yours truly, along with some effortless exhalations from Jacqueline Dividenda, my alter ego. She has written more than 78% of my work, under her own name, using my name, as a pseudonym, every other Friday, and some weekends. Jacqueline will continue backwards through my previous published volumes (Gallimaufries & A Side of Fries; June-bug, June-bug, June-bug; Tell me again, June-bug; The Lieutenant and the Other Lieutenant; Gallimaufries & a Side of Coleslaw; etc.) until she has written them all over again in her own name, and then they will be published in a retrospective series (Dividend Gold, the title-to-be) by Popf, again.

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